♥.•*¨ I'm . . . what??? ¨*•.♥

So I *emailed my query letter and wasn't sure what to expect. More rejections, of course!

I've been in 'writer mode' for over 20 years. So what I got back from the publisher took me by shock.
I literally feel like a dog who has devoted his life in chasing cars. Day in, day out. Until--I catch one!

Now what?

I've been in my comfort zone of rejectedness for years. Sounds ironic, doesn't it?

Let me tell you something, I was taken by total surprise. I thought, "Really? They want my book? Really?" I did more than pinch myself. I got sick. Literally.

Many thoughts of doubt, yes, doubt, jumbled up my head. Can you believe that? I wondered if I was making the right choice. So I prayed and fasted and prayed and fasted again before I replied to the acceptance letter. It was no easy thing for me.

I researched the publisher. Read their website. Their blog. Looked them up on Preditors & Editors, reviewed their authors' blogs and sites. I studied the mock contract. I asked questions. I did more research. I consulted expert writerly friends. I did it all.

After I felt that it was the Lord's will for me to go ahead with it, other thoughts popped into my crazed brain:
What if they read my entire novel and decide it's not as good as my query letter? What if they don't like my book? What if, what if! I went back and reread it and my stomach fell. I want to promote something that would make my publisher proud.

Darkspell has gone through 3 rewrites, roughly 3 editing sessions, over 4 critter palz, and yet, I felt unsure. I called a friend of mine who rocks with writing and asked for the dirty truth of my novel. She coached me on some details that flipped me into an oblivion.

I sunk further. I should've known better! Why did I decide to submit my query letter? How could I have submitted it this whole time, thinking my book rocked?

Blessedly, my publisher was okay with me doing a major face-lift. I cut over 5K words from my book. The fluff, you know? It's amazing how an acceptance letter makes a whole world of difference on my perspective of my MS.


Finally, after more praying, I whipped out the contract and signed and documented it!




 How do you imagine it to be for you when an agent or publisher says yes?


*late March